Friends in my head

My friends and I are celebu-stalkers. It is true, we follow their lives more than our family's, referencing them by their first names or nicknames even though we don't really know them personally, and playing 6-degrees of separation just so we can feel closer to them (heck yes I know Fernando Torres via two people!!!). It is also true that we know where some of said celebrities live. I have no idea why we glorify these people, most of them professional clothes wearers who really have no talent other than looking so damn fine. Others I love just because they are so damn gifted--sometimes too talented (See James McAvoy and Lupe Fiasco). Then there are those I love to hate (see Cristiano Ronaldo). Finally, there are those who are friends in my head.
First, let me explain the concept of a friend in your head: It is a person you don't know directly but think you would be really good friends with them if you did. Don't start judging now because I know you have thought about this more than once. We are all friends here... at least in my head we are.

So here is a list of some my friends in my head

• Ed Westwick: He is just so suave, so cool, so complimentary to my style lol. He just doesn't seem to give a damn, much like me. The only problem I would have with this dude is that he is a supposed Chelsea F.C fan and as a Liverpool fan, I don't know how this would go down. Game days would be interesting though.
• Christopher Mintz-Plasse: If he is anything like his claim to fame, McLovin, Chris would be a damn good addition to my crew in my head.
• Leighton Meester: from what I gather in her interviews, this chick is hilarious. Not to mention she has good style and everyone needs a friend with style.
  
• Kevin Jonas: ...because the other two don't cut it lol.
• Shia LaBeouf: A negro loving white guy. Who doesn't want that in their entourage? Plus he is a member of Cardboard City which includes, Head Automatica. Oh and how could I forget the humor. If he is good enough for Steven he is good enough for me.

• Jason Mraz: He's skinny but fat full of rhymes. That video has to be one of my fav Mraz moments.
• Lupe Fiasco: Luuu! Who doesn't want a friend that can flow like Lu? I mean he just reeks of cool and he knows it- he named his album "The Cool." As most of the people close to me know, shoes are kind of a big deal to me and Lupe KNOWS shoes. I mean his style is nearly flawless. Above are the shoes he and Dr. Romanelli designed for Converse- are they not beautiful?
  
• Craig Ferguson: I LOL every single time I watch his show. Somewhere between his accent and crazy antics I realized, I would love some Craig in my life.

• Dave Chappelle: It is hard to believe but some people have never watched this cat in action and I must say it is a damn shame! But if you have, you know he is a genius- a comical genius. That video brings me to my next person...
  
• Mos Def: don't get me started on him. He is perfection personified (See movie: Something the Lord Made).
  
• Andre 3000: He has a number in his name and can pull it off unlike some people (See 50 cent). What more can you ask for?
• The Arctic Monkeys: All of them.
  
• Peter Crouch: I love this man even though he doesn't play for Liverpool anymore (bitches for letting him go).
• Rupert Grint: God sent down a blessing in the form of a ginger.
  
• M.I.A.
• Tyra: She is fierce!

• Bon Qui Qui: Don't start with that whole "Bon qui qui is not real" BS. We all know a Bon qui qui. Why do I wan't a Bon qui qui in my faux entourage? Because she is not afraid to CUT you.
  
• Vivica A. Fox: If Bon qui qui was real, she would be Vivica.
  
• Tia Mowry: I just can't put my finger on it but I love this girl (in a totally non "I kissed a girl and I liked it" way).
• Neil Patrick Harris: (See Dr. Horrible's Sing-a-long Blogs)

• Brangelina and their mini United Nations: I gotta have them. They are just too perfect for words. My only problem is the way they treat that poor child Zahara- get the girl a damn black hairstylist! Having her hair looking like that everywhere you go. It's a damn shame! You have money, get her hair did!
• Janet Jackson: She is just so damn nice isn't she. Always polite, always sweet, always put together. I need that in my faux-entourage- she would be the equivalent to my bff Emy.
  
• Kal Penn: Because everyone needs a funny brown man in their crew. Kal is my man. He proved himself in the Harold and Kumar films.
• John Krasinski: no words.

• Brett and Jermaine of Flight of the Conchords: Because everyone should have the fourth most popular guitar-based, digi-bongo, acapella-rap-funk-comedy folk duo in their crew.
• Sascha Baron Cohen
• Santogold: So I can borrow her jackets.
• Wyclef Jean: A friend with a message.
  
• Kat Williams: If there was anyone who could convince me that smoking the ganja was good for you ("Hungry, happy, sleepy...those are the side effects") on the basis that "it is a plant...it just grow," it would be Kat. Plus he voices A Pimp Named Slickback (yes you have to say the whole thing...even the "A Pimp" part) on The Boondocks. He has exposed the horrors of "Chronic Bitch Dependency," something the world needs to know about.
  

• Riley Freeman: So he is a cartoon... anything goes in my faux entourage people! I don't discriminate. Riley AKA Young Reezy is Thug Life at it's best. He has a fair amount of criminal knowledge, which would make him a welcome entry to my crew. He also doesn't discriminate..."based on gendaah." He uses "bitches" as a general term for women, not specific women. Plus, anyone that refers to Santa as a "bitch ass nigga" is alright with me. Telling children to believe in that crap is just cruel.
  

• Thugnificent: While I'm on this Boondocks run, I might as well talk about Thugnificent. Hell, the video above speaks for itself. Like me, he "likes to invest in the arts, and invest in himself."

[I promise that is the last of the YouTube videos... don't want to go on overload here even though I think I just might have]

• The creators of Potter Puppet Pals: ...ok more like the potter puppet pals themselves. I would love a spontaneous chorus of puppets somewhere in my crew.
  
• Amanda Bynes: She's the man!
• Sergio Ramos: I needed a Spanish addition to my crew. I know you probably thought I would chose Fernando Torres in a heartbeat, and I really would like to put him in my entourage but I'd rather not want to sex up my friends. So Sergio Ramos is a safe bet: he seems pretty hilarious and is a damn good footballer.
  
• Captain Jack Sparrow: Do I need to explain this one? Really? Really?
  
• Zach Efron: I need someone to do my makeup and make sure it is spot on if I decide to start caring about what I look like.
• Wall-E: All he has to do is say his name to be awesome.
  

...I'm getting lazy now so I'll just stop here. I shall resume this post at a later date.
Who would you like in your faux-entourage?